Breaking up isn’t that hard to do

In ninth grade there was a boy, maybe a year younger than me, that liked me and I didn’t like him. He had one of those generic boy names, Ryan, Michael, Sean (what I’m trying to say here is that I don’t remember) He was really annoying, kind of a perv, and, unfortunately, my best friend’s soon-to-be step-cousin. There was no escaping him, most of the times I would come over he would somehow show up and bother us or bother me. One day I had the great plan that if I said yes to him, then the nuisance would stop. We ended up “going out” for a week or two, which consisted of him calling me all the time and me ignoring him anytime I would see him. He must’ve gotten bored or maybe he wasn’t as dumb as I thought and figured me out, because he finally called to break up with me. I got the old “it’s not you, it’s me” story in freaking ninth grade. What did I do? I cried, I mean I balled, I ugly cried. I didn’t really care, but at the same time I couldn’t help it. I believe this was my first “fake cry” as a woman. Just like that he started going out with some other girl he could kiss and fool around with (good old three way calling, it doesn’t always hang up. I got to hear all about the new girl in his next call).

Then there was W. He really liked me and I thought he was dorky in a cute way so of course I went out with him. All we did was make out; we never really talked be it over the phone or when we were together. Our first time together it just fizzled out, actually the second time it fizzled out as well. The worst part about it? He sounded so sorry on the phone telling me how he “cheated” on me, while I was just bored and not saying anything, which he took for me being heartbroken. I figured, let some other girl deal with it, I knew I didn’t want to.

My latest breakup though, this one actually hurts. Not sure why since I was constantly treated like I wasn’t wanted or important. I tried to make the relationship work, putting my time and money into it, but it finally broke. I don’t appreciate being lied to, especially when it’s something I know a lot about, so I’m making a clean break. No phone calls, no “it’s not you it’s me” b.s. It’s over. Things I know a lot about: music, art, photography, designers, food, yarn. Can you guess which is the one I’m referring to now? I’m one lys short, all because of a stupid skein of yarn at the register.

me: this is pretty! what is it?
her: oh, umm, something I’m going to carry, I don’t carry it yet. It’ll be a while!
me: ok, it feels great. what is it?
her: it’s from South Africa
me: ahh, is it be sweet mohair?
her: umm, no it’s not Be Sweet.

uncomfortable silence

me: umm, whatever it is, it’s really gorgeous!

uncomfortable silence

Did I mention this was happening as I was paying for some overpriced needles, also known as addis? What did I do when I went home? Googled the hell out of it and unless there’s some other company from South Africa selling Mohair Magic Balls in a color named “underwater” we can safely say it’s Be Sweet! Why did I feel like I was on Seinfeld? Does anyone remember the Tuscany episode?

So I drink to my latest breakup, wearing the last remnant from the relationship and not a great one at that.

Previous Post Next Post

You Might Also Like

  • tammy October 4, 2005 at 11:57 am

    RAD post! I was captivated & really felt your emotions!Lame lys’s really suck! We sell Be Sweet yarns, & now whenever someone asks me about it, I will think of you!

  • castoncastoff October 4, 2005 at 1:05 pm

    you’re better off with yarn, yarn and more yarn my dear, forget the b. – sending you hugs from London….Kirsty 🙂

  • Amy October 4, 2005 at 1:55 pm

    Those dork-a-lorks. I will never understand the attitude that most LYS’ workers have.

  • eunny October 4, 2005 at 2:45 pm

    If I were a different kind of person, I’d tell you that you rock out with your cock out. You totally made my day with this post.See ’em in hell, right?

  • tabbytuxedo October 4, 2005 at 3:39 pm

    That is not a good way to treat a customer. What a moron!

  • Colleen October 4, 2005 at 4:10 pm

    Nothing makes me want to shop elsewhere more than an LYS that gives you the hairy eyeball for gathering yarn informatoin.

  • Purly Whites October 4, 2005 at 4:25 pm

    Hee hee!But still, what an asshole!

  • Angela October 4, 2005 at 5:17 pm

    How RUDE! I hate when LYS workers act all snotty, especially if you’re still a beginner.. ugh.

  • Tara October 4, 2005 at 6:18 pm

    ugh. How annoying. One of the many reasons I buy most of my yarn online

  • kate October 4, 2005 at 8:09 pm

    you really had me going with that breakup story…must be all the brain cells i killed knitting all this goddam lace. anyway, that is a tragedy. but if you love something, you must set it free yahaira.

  • carrie October 4, 2005 at 9:16 pm

    i was all prepared to tell you how *sorry* i was for your break-up! i must be unbelievably gullible.i hate snootiness at lyses. (is that the plural?) where does it come from? why can’t they be kind and friendly?

  • illanna October 4, 2005 at 9:22 pm

    You should go back in there and fake cry.Seriously, though, what balls. I’m going to castrate her balls, like those sad sorry ass Be Sweet goats in South Africa.

  • Jeanie October 4, 2005 at 10:50 pm

    Okay, you really had me going on that one… But I agree about the break-up. You’re better off and you deserve better 😉

  • Wendy October 4, 2005 at 11:56 pm

    Just don’t have any post-breakup you know what’s, and certainly, under no circumstances, any drunken dialing when you find you just have to have to have that skein of mohair at 1:00 a.m.Wendy

  • savannahchik October 5, 2005 at 5:45 am

    can’t say i’m surprised — she’s got to be one of the coldest store LYS owners in the area (which makes no sense — how do you expect people to pay higher prices than online if you’re not even giving them good customer service?!?!)anyway — good for you for not giving her any more of your money. there are too many options in south jersey to bother with one with poor service.

  • Diana October 5, 2005 at 9:47 am

    Sounds like a very healthy breakup! Hey, there is always online yarn shopping!

  • winnie October 5, 2005 at 7:01 pm

    i totally support your break up. sounds like the snooty biatch needs abit of ass-kicking anyways.

  • Axelle October 5, 2005 at 11:49 pm

    Hey there! I just stumbled across this here and I’m sorry you’ve been feeling aggrieved. I feel like I must have missed something there, though. Could it be possible that the woman at the LYS simply hadn’t heard of “Be Sweet” mohair? I know I hadn’t.